rocky horror picture show halloween

hey! i'm jennifer culp, and today i'm going to time warp your ass through a very special rocky horror edition of make your face! rocky horror is basically a hot pile of nonsense, written by richard o'brien, as an ode to low budget mid-twentieth-century horror and sci-fi movies in 1973. it opens on ostensible heroes brad and

janet, a cis, straight-y straight, societally sanctioned duo, who become engaged, and then subsequently blunder into a scenario in which they find themselves disempowered by deviants: flamboyant non- gender-normative presenting peopleâ€“ who, perhaps less concerningly to our sweater-clad superheroes, also appear to be murdererous, mad scientist

extraterrestrials. god bless our girl janet, who looks exactly the way she thinks people want to see her. girl just wants to be loved...and for that, people call her a slut. columbia, that sparkly bitch, is tap dancing on the bare edge of sanity by the time we encounter her. have you ever really listened to her

lyrics? she first met frank n. furter in a pickup truck. can you even imagine frank driving a pickup truck? i mean, i guess i can, it's just weird. colombia is a personal favorite of mine because...sparkles, dancing...and she terrifies brad, a man who clings to the comfort of his perceived masculine normalcy so strongly that he literally experiences

perception of his own sexual attractiveness as a foreign sensation. as always, let your lash glue dry to a tacky consistency before sticking the lash wigs to your eyelids, and girl, i wouldn't recommend columbia's movie brows to anyone, but, bleaching your own brows out sure makes it easier if you want to do it. oh! and back to my man brad, i didn't have

so much time to talk about him, but he wears a lot of foundation, little lip and maybe some eyeliner. heavy cheekbone and adam's apple contour, and heavy glasses. columbia, my darling, i will play you in a community theater production someday. biker boy eddie, on the other hand, (columbia's great love), loses half of his brain and (spoiler alert) his entire life

to his flirtation with the counterculture. bless his rotten little heart. eddie lived fast, died young, and a imagic flash palette purchased from ebay is a great way to paint on fake scars. meat loaf is sexy, just in case you wanted my opinion on that. extraterrestrial servants and

superfreaks riffraff and magenta are 100000% over this planet, and this shit, and very eager to be back in their own time traveling orgasmic safe space away from the normies. (maniacal laughter) whoa sort of impressed by my own cackle right now! magenta is heavy on the eye makeupâ€“ double lashesâ€“and of course, she has the

iconic lips of the whole fucking party... so if you're trying to look like magenta, go heavy on the glossy red...a handy tip, since our gal's makeup's taking me a little longer than riffraff's....when you put fake lashes on your bottom eyelid, make sure to stick them up under your eyelashes: do not glue anything to your waterline. did you know that magenta is

the color precisely between blue and red? it's extremely vibrant if you put some prisms up, and then like, cross them? yeah yeah yeah...and oh! there's our eponymous created golden boy rocky, born directly into a position of uninvited ogling and sexual exploitation more commonly reserved for women characters in pop cultural representation! frank n

furter, star of the fucking show, but also, in an outsize play on the "sexual other as villain" trope, an exploiter, a kidnapper, a rapist, serial abuser and a murderer... frank is not a good person, certainly not to be emulated, and certainly not a model for regular representation of queer people, or non gender-normative people in

media...that recognized, i and i'm sure many other viewers still feel a euphoric cathartic sense of glee upon watching frank chew up all of the scenery and other actors over the course of the play. too fabulous, selfish, sexual...just too much to be contained. frank doesn't even try to dial it back, but instead wreaks havoc and wrecks the lives of everybody he

comes in contact with. nice? fuck no. happy halloween!